Touchstones
Inner qualities and timeless teachings that support healing
Alongside our work together, I sometimes draw on teachings from Buddhist psychology.
You don’t need to be Buddhist to benefit from these - they are simply timeless truths and inner qualities that can support healing, growth, and deeper presence.
They remind us that we already carry the seeds of wisdom and compassion within us.
The Four Noble Truths
The Buddha’s first teaching speaks simply to the human condition:
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There is suffering (dukkha) - pain, loss, and dissatisfaction are part of life.
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Suffering has causes - it often arises from grasping, aversion, and misunderstanding.
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Suffering can end - freedom is possible.
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There is a path - through cultivating awareness, compassion, and wise action, we can find peace.
These truths offer hope: suffering is not a personal failure, and healing is possible.
The Brahma-Vihāras
Also known as the “Four Immeasurables,” these are heart qualities that can be nurtured through practice:
- 🌸 Loving-kindness (mettā) - wishing well for ourselves and others
- 🌸 Compassion (karuṇā) - meeting suffering with care
- 🌸 Joy (muditā) - delighting in the happiness of others
- 🌸 Equanimity (upekkhā) - staying balanced and open-hearted through life’s changes
They are like inner companions that soften and steady the heart.
Seeing Clearly
Much of our suffering softens when we begin to see clearly the nature of our experience.
These “three imps” - a phrase from meditation teacher Martin Aylward, drawn from core Buddhist teachings - can open the way:
- 🌱 Imperfect - we are perfectly imperfect; nothing about us needs to be fixed to be worthy of love
- 🌱 Impermanent - everything changes; all feelings, thoughts, and states pass in time
- 🌱 Impersonal - our thoughts and emotions arise from many interwoven conditions; they are not the whole of who we are
Seeing life this way can bring relief.
It creates space to step back, breathe, and rest in witness consciousness - a quiet, steady awareness that holds all of our changing experience with compassion.
The Ten Perfections (Pāramitās)
These are qualities of character we can gently cultivate over time.
They offer a map for living with integrity and depth:
- 🌼 Generosity (dāna) - trusting there is enough, and sharing what we can
- 🌼 Ethical conduct (sīla) - living from our values
- 🌼 Patience (kṣānti) - letting things unfold in their time
- 🌼 Energy (vīrya) - steady, wholehearted effort
- 🌼 Meditative concentration (dhyāna) - resting in presence
- 🌼 Wisdom (prajñā) - seeing things clearly as they are
- 🌼 Skillful means (upāya) - responding flexibly to each moment
- 🌼 Aspiration (praṇidhāna) - holding a vision that uplifts and guides us
- 🌼 Strength (bala) - trusting our inner resilience
- 🌼 Deep insight (jñāna) - understanding what is true beneath appearances
They are not rules, but inner qualities that naturally grow as we walk the path.
These teachings are not things to “achieve” - they are like seeds we can water.
They invite us to return, again and again, to our inherent capacity for awareness, compassion, and wholeness.
